Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Future Rose

I've been doing some thinking (and not just about that crazy Bachelor finale...Jason, you cad!). Despite the peanut gallery's insistence that I am 28, I am actually 27. I've been practicing law for almost three years at a large law firm in Manhattan. I can do my own taxes, buy a pretty sweet handbag on occasion and even make a successful souffle (ok, I did it once in a cooking class). I also have an amazing ability to constantly think that little narcissistic rant prominent in so many twentysomethings aka "when will my life become something?". You know, the quest for that symbolic "milestone" like when you fall in love, have kids, make a million bucks or see your picture on a Wheaties box (no dice Michael Phelps).

As a 2nd grader I often pondered the sad and empty state of my parent's lives because they were not famous. This seems quite amusing now, but I legitimately believed it at the time. I thought, and in many ways still do think, that there must be something that defines you to the world and makes you "something". For me, it has always been career oriented. Now, as the economy tanks and dreams of partnership in a law firm (or leaving said law firm to work for the public interest) tank right along with the Dow, what is a girl to do? Continue on to 28 maintaining the status quo? Keep whining about cupcake consumption? Do some random research to make myself feel better? Good idea.

Rachael Ray was 29 when she did her cooking segments on local cable tv in upstate NY. My father was 31 when, his wife in the hospital having just had their first child, he started his general contracting company. A prominent law firm partner for whom I have tremendous respect didn't graduate law school until he was 36. The New Kids on the Block are new all over again and Jon is close to 40. All of these examples combine taking a risk to become something by doing something - for example, getting rid of the name NKOTB was a really good idea.

So I guess we are all supposed to step out of our comfort zones more to find that something? Let's be honest, I have a tough time with risk. The will be no random declarations of personal goals I plan to pursue. I'm still trying to figure those out and will do so in my typical anal retentive fashion. Perhaps instead of planning the next 5 years, I'll figure out the next month, practice my souffles and write better entries on here...or at least decide what to wear to work.

One thing I do know is that I still have 2 years to starting cooking on TV. Watch out Rachael, we all know you can't bake...

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