Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Padma is trying to punish me. I really don't know what I ever did to her. I mean, clearly she won in the genetic gifts department. She has also won in the "owns cool stuff", "has a cool job" and "gets to do cool things" departments (proven when I had box seats at a Knicks game last week only to look up and see she was sitting courtside). So, why must she taunt me by having the season finale of Top Chef on Ash Wednesday? Instead of sitting in front of my TV eating a delicious meat based entree, I will be pondering, stomach growling, what I have done to deserve such misery. Truth be told, I should be thinking "I deserve this misery and I should go to confession and repent", and perhaps I will, having been raised with a healthy sense of Roman Catholic guilt. Either way, I am dreading salivating over Carla's cooking while fasting (not to mention breaking out on my forehead from greasy ashes). I suppose I could wait and watch the finale on Thursday, but there are so many risks to that strategy...the main one being that someone will reveal the ending to me and I will maim them in a hunger enhanced rage. I will just have to watch the episode in real time and make due with what is "allowed".
After all, there are various approaches to Ash Wednesday fasting. They include: (i) no food or drink; (2) no food, beverages ok; (3) one normal meal, beverages ok; (4) one normal meal supplemented by a few smaller meals that don't equal the big meal; and (5) a few small meals. I am a 3, 4 or 5 girl myself, though I always start off the day as a 3. Not matter what, the "no meat" part is the key. Oh, and walking around with ashes on your forehead and getting stared at even more than usual on the subway. And repenting for making sarcastic comments about the ashes (sorry).
Of course, I did prepare for today by consuming every delicious treat I could possibly think of on the aptly named Fat Tuesday. This led to my discovery of Lindt Pistachio Chocolate. This slice (bar) of heaven is swiss milk chocolate with whole pistachio nuts in almond filling. Now that is a treat. The gluttony of eating almost the entire bar made me think I should give up chocolate for lent...which made me eat the rest of the chocolate...which made me conclude that I should not give up chocolate for lent.
Now I start my day still trying to decide what to give up. Looking back, my mother always gave up liver, something I have never seen her consume in her life. This is cheating though...even if my allergy to shellfish makes giving up shrimp incredibly appealing. It should be something food related because that is beneficial to my waistline, and because, though it is quite early, swearing is already out of the question. It can't be baked goods, I have done ice cream before (5 times) and I already ruled out chocolate. Maybe swedish fish? Perhaps cocktails (and by that I mean fancy ones at bars, not the ones I make at home, this is a recession, let's not make it a depression).
At least there is one benefit of fasting - I have the entire day to decide (oh, that and the whole chance to repent thing...sorry, again).